The Coolest Thing You'll See All Day

So, we all know and love Brandon Rigoni. How many times did we drunkenly cheer as he blew holes in the opponents wedge, or absolutely light up some poor kick returner to whip Memorial Stadium into a frenzy? Tons.

Well, turns out he had a little bet going with Mark Manning (the Husker's wrestling coach). Rigoni had to score five times, on five attempts, with a running start toward a funnel at the three yard line. It's been an ongoing thing between the two of them for years, and finally, they took to the field to settle the score.

I love Husker Football.

Good Day.

It's been a good day.

Got up at 10:00.
Started doing laundry at 10:30
Started Drinking at 10:25
Had a sub from Lenny's Subs at 1:00
Watched "Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story"
Talked to an agent at Travel and Transport about Honeymoon Destinations
Found out that the top recruit in the 2009 Class is not coming to Alabama
Deposited my check from Alabama Volleyball Camps
Bought some carmex and stamps
Watched a DVRed version of Family (Road to Germany)
USF vs Louisville is about to start
Drunk

...the Phillies won

And He Just Lost My Vote.

Goddamn. You know, I was so close to actually voting for a Democrat this year. So close to voting for "hope" and "change". Then, I saw this video:

Obamanation - Que?

If you don't know why this pisses me off so much, let me tell you what I expect from my government.

1. Defend our borders.
2. Defend our culture.
3. Defend our language.

I do not expect my government to pander to a rapidly growing majority, many of whom are in our country illegally, and annually send upwards of $5 billion flowing across our border to their impoverished homeland ruled by a corrupt dictatorial "democracy".

Sorry Obama. But this year I'm voting for a candidate I can get behind.

(Yes, I've already bought the tshirt.)

NFL Max Power Rankings

Halfway through the season and the Patriots do just enough to stay at the top of the polls, but the Titans and Giants are charging hard. The Steelers maintain a hold in the top four, leading a whole herd of teams looking to push for the playoffs. The bye weeks will soon be over as the teams gear up for the stretch. And now, the Week 8 NFL Max Power Rankings.

Patriots 35.17
Titans 34.05
Giants 32.33
Steelers 29.20
Cowboys 28.76
Packers 28.22
Redskins 27.78
Buccaneers 27.40
Cardinals 26.61
Panthers 26.56
Eagles 25.92
Bears 24.85
Colts 24.60
Browns 24.15
Saints 23.21
Broncos 22.93
Jaguars 22.66
Chargers 22.28
Bills 21.86
Texans 21.72
Vikings 21.60
Ravens 21.59
Jets 19.08
Falcons 18.50
Dolphins 18.02
Seahawks 17.02
Rams 13.56
Raiders 10.90
49ers 8.72
Lions 8.11
Bengals 6.79
Chiefs 5.57

Cold and Flu Season

Does anyone ever get that feeling by your soft palate that there's some kind of snot there but you just can't spit it out? No matter how much you gargle or hock at it, there's no moving that invisible loogie.

Also we lost this weekend...twice. It's not that we played bad, we just played better competition and made some timely errors. The Steelers lost, too. Priority number one...Draft an offensive lineman that can protect your franchise quarterback. Draft many offensive linemen. Use the entire draft for offensive linemen. Get them in free agency, too. You can have 11 players on the field. Lets have 9 of them be linemen, 1 quarterback, and the other guy is a receiver or a running back. Super Bowl.

Humpday Thing That Is Awesome

Every Wednesday, Max gives you a glimpse into his world by revealing something he thinks is, indeed, awesome. Today's entry: "Fringe".

Holy God is the new TV show "Fringe" awesome. Like, better than "Lost" awesome. It's only five or six episodes into its first season, and I am completely hooked. The characters are great, from the understated hotness of the main character, to the ridiculously skinny tall black guy, to the bald creepy guy who likes to watch.

Its like X-Files, but with less whining and more better. The episodes are all self-contained, but there is an underlying plot that holds everything together. It's very well done and did I mention the lead character is kind of hot?

It does have Pacey from "Dawson's Creek" in it. But I'll take a little Joshua Jackson if it means I get to see people's brains get microwaved in a diner and some lady give birth to a "OH MY GOD WHAT IS THAT THING?!".

In conclusion, "Fringe" is awesome.

Pandora

I know I am not always up to date on the latest things on the intertubes (that is what Max and D do the best), but I just learned about Pandora and I think it is pretty cool. It is great for those people who sit in their office and want to listen to some good music and not depend on the crap the radio has to offer. Also, unlike XM radio, you can customize your own stations and it will save them all for you. The only down side I have found is that you can only use Pandora on your phone if you are a Sprint or AT&T customer. For those unlucky souls who do not have either of these services do not worry; we can still listen online to our hearts content.

Like I have said before, I am not the proverbial internet "guru" but, if you like music, this is the place to go. Enjoy!

pandora.com

NFL Max Power Rankings

Just when you thought the Patriots were done, they hang 41 on a hapless Donkey defense and maintain the top spot. The AFC is looking strong, with the top three each in different divisions. But the next six teams on the list are all NFC teams, so there seems to be a lot parity between the conferences at the top. On to the Week 7 Max Power Rankings.

Patriots 34.57
Titans 32.46
Steelers 31.82
Giants 29.71
Buccaneers 29.60
Cardinals 28.64
Packers 28.22
Cowboys 26.56
Redskins 26.53
Colts 26.19
Jaguars 25.30
Bears 24.85
Bills 24.62
Panthers 24.53
Chargers 24.23
Eagles 23.81
Broncos 22.93
Vikings 21.60
Browns 21.51
Saints 21.26
Falcons 20.61
Ravens 19.25
Texans 19.12
Jets 18.16
Dolphins 15.26
Rams 14.16
Seahawks 14.14
Raiders 13.66
49ers 11.60
Bengals 9.38
Lions 9.36
Chiefs 6.49

Nice Hit.

I Expect You To Die, Mr. Bond.

So, on Friday I got a new project.

I am on the team that will be putting the materials together for the Lincoln Chapter of the American Marketing Association's Prism Awards.

The theme: James Bond.

Hot Damn.

Macbook?

Here's a question...the new Macbook or a new Dell XPS 1330? I love how people describe the Dell as "sexy"...not unlike myself. On the other hand, the Macbook has unibody technology. This is a pickle.

Simpletech External Harddrive

This thing is crapping out on me and I swear to God if I lose all my music and pictures and stuff I will rain unholy fire and brimstone on Santa Ana, California.

Humpday Thing That Is Awesome

Every Wednesday, Max gives you a glimpse into his world by revealing something he thinks is, indeed, awesome. Today's entry: Carmex.

Holy God is Carmex awesome. It is the most addictive, soothing lip balm ever. I'm not sure if there is anything better than the relief that comes with coating your lips with the translucent yellow substance. Truly, I'm not sure.

It comes in tiny little pots you can dip your finger in. It comes in an easy dispensing squeeze tube. And now it comes in a clickable stick format. Take your pick. Each method is guaranteed to deliver Octinoxate and Oxybenzone to your parched kissers.

Plus, there's the old urban legend that the makers lace it with drugs to keep you coming back for more. Wait a minute. A palliative ointment that comes with chemical dependence? Sign me up.

In conclusion, Carmex is awesome.

bored

omg am i bored.

i have been watching a status bar on a computer screen for the last 5 hours.

NFL Max Power Rankings

Week 6 was a shakeup...with some of the top teams losing games and some of the bottom teams winning. The Patriots were able to hang on to first, thanks to losses by the Cowboys, Giants and Redskins. There is a bit of a logjam (I just got Truth's attention) for the top five spots, and an even bigger mess in the middle. The next few weeks should separate the wheat from the chaff.

Patriots 31.71
Titans 30.71
Cowboys 30.58
Steelers 29.69
Colts 29.04
Cardinals 28.64
Giants 28.63
Buccaneers 28.09
Chargers 26.69
Broncos 25.79
Packers 25.37
Jaguars 25.30
Redskins 24.81
Saints 24.59
Eagles 23.81
Vikings 23.35
Browns 23.23
Bears 23.10
Bills 22.16
Panthers 21.20
Jets 20.65
Falcons 20.61
Dolphins 18.27
Texans 17.73
Ravens 16.24
Seahawks 15.65
49ers 12.68
Bengals 11.51
Lions 10.75
Raiders 10.75
Rams 10.14
Chiefs 8.24

We went 2-0!

Wow. I didn't think it was a possibility but we swept a weekend in the SEC! We beat Arkansas 3-1 on Friday and then beat Ole Miss 3-1 on Sunday. We switched the lineup from a 5-1 to a 6-2 and we increased our kills from 40 kills/match to 60 kills/match. That'll do it. Now we just have to do it vs Florida and Kentucky.

I saw that Furman lost to Samford. Dude, we played Samford in our pre-conference tournament and they are good. They got that transfer from Middle Tennessee State (the lefty) that is rediculously good. She just decided to go to law school at Samford for her senior year...and said, "Oh, by the way, I think I'll play volleyball for these guys, too!"

I'm upset but encouraged by the Husker's performance this weekend at Texas Tech. I'm very upset about the way it ended. Joe, you just gotta take that sack and score on one of the next two plays. But still, we've got a good season ahead of us. GBR!

Some Friday Morning Tunes

The Quarter Century

Now over the last few years I have been looking forward to my birthdays because I always knew that day would be surrounded by days of drunken debauchery and just plain goodness. Well, this year marks a quarter century for me and I think it is a monumental event for The Table as a whole. I am the last member to reach this point and it is a shame that we cannot all celebrate it together. People say that 25 is a defining point in one's life. It is at this age where we are to start being an adult; at least that is what society says. We all know I am not one to conform easily and I have just one thing to say to these people...BLAMMO! To those personages who do not think that beer is part of a nutritious breakfast...BLAMMO! I will not give up what The Table has worked and fought so hard to accomplish. You might be asking yourself "What on earth is Ice talking about?" Well, my brethren, I am talking about our age old tradition of Jackassery. Who cares that we are now a combined age of over 100...BLAMMO! Oh man, I cannot wait until December; The Table will once again stand on all fours...just the way B Shizzle likes it.

Super Max!

Teehee.

I didn't realize...

...that "This Ain't a Scene" by Fallout Boy was such a high song vocally. I dabbled in it for karaoke tonight and 1. you can't say "God damn" in front of a crowd at BW's before 11:00. 2. that song is really high to sing. I don't think I'll be trying that one again anytime soon!

Humpday Thing That Is Awesome

Every Wednesday, Max gives you a glimpse into his world by revealing something he thinks is, indeed, awesome. Today's entry: fine-tipped pens.

Holy God are fine-tipped pens awesome. Is there anything better than laying down an incredibly straight, incredibly smooth line in red, black or blue ink? No. The answer is no.

It doesn't smudge like pencil. It doesn't bleed through the paper like marker. It doesn't smear like thicker tips that lay down a lot of ink. It just gives precise control over your doodles and notes. It puts the entire languages at your disposal. Allows you to create an entire universe to conquer.

Plus, the familiar "click" of the cap popping off means you are about to unleash the contents of your brain into the world. There are few things that match the feeling of pressing the pen against a blank piece of paper. The possibilities are myriad. You are about to make thoughts and ideas concrete, tangible. It is the ultimate beginning to unending possibilities.

In conclusion: Fine-tipped pens are awesome.

Sister Act

SNL is becoming relevant again. This is hilarious.

NFL Max Power Rankings

Well, Reggie Bush is a legit NFL stud, but his team wasted an all-star effort. The Bills ran into a team that hit back, and lost their first game of the season. The Chiefs looked fantastic. Pittsburgh gutted out another workman-like victory. The Patriots are still the tops, but can they maintain the position with the Cowboys, Giants and Titans nipping at their heels. Here they are, the Week 6 Max Power Rankings.

Patriots 35.38
Cowboys 32.88
Giants 32.09
Titans 30.71
Steelers 29.69
Broncos 28.65
Redskins 28.40
Cardinals 26.34
Colts 25.92
Bears 25.22
Panthers 24.75
Buccaneers 24.54
Packers 23.25
Chargers 23.02
Jaguars 22.44
Vikings 22.30
Bills 22.16
Eagles 21.85
Saints 21.46
Dolphins 20.17
Browns 19.77
Ravens 19.36
Jets 18.75
Falcons 18.49
Seahawks 17.77
Texans 15.83
Raiders 14.30
49ers 14.14
Bengals 13.41
Lions 11.80
Chiefs 8.24
Rams 6.55

I was under the impression that everyone had heard...

Does anyone else have Surfin' Bird stuck in their heads?

Time To Die, Mr. Bond.

I don't wear watches (because I don't own one that works), but if I did, it would be one of these awesome 007 Villain watches from Swatch.

I love the Dr. No version.

Big Weekend

I work best in lists...
1. Florida tonight
2. Biggest recruit (on paper) that Alabama has ever seen for volleyball. Although I'm bound by NCAA regulations to tell you who she is, she's got game.
3. Alabama vs Kentucky
4. HUSKERS vs Missouri...I hate Missouri
5.Alabama volleyball vs South Carolina
6. Steelers vs Jags...Payback. Jerks.
...If we can go 6 for 6 this weekend, I should get a raise.

Master Anglers

Professor Truth and Max went fishing last night, with sexy results.

Humpday Thing That Is Awesome

Every Wednesday, Max gives you a glimpse into his world by revealing something he thinks is, indeed, awesome. Today's entry: soup.

Holy God is soup awesome. Of all the culinary artists since the dawn of time, none has done more than the first sonuvabitch who threw everything laying around the cave into a mammoth-skin bag and boiled it. That man was a genius.

The thing I like about soup is it can be anything. What's your favorite food? Steak? Put it in the soup. You like broccoli? Throw it in. You adore leg of lamb? Let's simmer that for an hour and see how it tastes. Why the hell not. It's soup! To quote the modern genius Carl Weathers, "You got yourself a stew goin'."

Soup is amazing. It's magic. It tastes better after you've left it sit in the fridge over night. Let's see salad do that!

In conclusion: Soup is awesome.

Compliance Meeting!

I'm about to go to a compliance meeting to make sure we are up to date on all the rules of the NCAA. I love these damn meetings because they serve these ham and cheese croissants. They are delicious. They may be more delicious because they're free, I don't know.