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good to be back on the tubes.


feels good.

NFL Max Power Rankings

In my constant effort to be a huge nerd, I have applied rudimentary scientific principles to NFL games. Here are the Week 5 Max Power Rankings.

Patriots 34.31
Cowboys 32.18
Giants 29.27
Titans 28.96
Steelers 27.71
Broncos 26.91
Buccaneers 26.28
Redskins 26.19
Packers 26.10
Chargers 25.81
Bills 24.88
Jaguars 24.42
Colts 24.30
Eagles 24.06
Saints 23.86
Cardinals 23.67
Bears 22.17
Panthers 21.41
Ravens 21.11
Seahawks 20.59
Vikings 19.90
Browns 19.77
Jets 18.75
Texans 17.45
Dolphins 17.38
Falcons 15.64
49ers 15.21
Lions 14.35
Raiders 14.30
Bengals 14.11
Chiefs 11.58
Rams 6.55

Girl's Night Out

So I just get done watching Correll Buckhalter not get into the end-zone from one yard out (3 times) and I give Angie a call to say goodnight. When she answers there is a burst of laughter from 4 tipsy girls who are having a "girls night." Angie then passes me around to everyone in the the group and I make nice talk with all of them. She has to let me go and call back once everyone leaves. Then she tells me that I killed the buzz of all the girls in the group because I'm a grouch. I'm a little indifferent to this news...first, I wasn't expecting that level of energy when I called, so I think I should be cut some slack for carrying on a pretty good conversation. Second, it's good to know that I can turn off 4 drunk girls from 500 miles away.
Go Steelers!

Volleyball Iron Bowl

Like many people from Nebraska, I had never heard of or cared for the stupid Iron Bowl. Don't get me wrong, I've come to enjoy my Alabama football. The atmosphere is great on gameday and they're actually good now. Having said that..."GBR!"
Anyway, the volleyball version of the iron bowl is taking place tonight in Tuscaloosa in the CAVE where Alabama is 15-1 against Auburn since the turn of the century. We are currently trying to take our team "From Good to Great" (Which is a book, too) and we're not exactly sure which team is going to show up tonight...the great one, or the crappy one. We will see. We will see.
...The Huskers are good.

BLAMMO!

Well, it has been entirely too long since someone has written on blog and i am taking it upon myself to put something up there. as we all know the Table is once again uniting. not in lincoln but in chicago. if this is not the mother of great ideas than i don't know what is. with the last minute addition of suede benjamin the Table will, for three days, be whole once again. now, i don't know what will actually happen, but in my mind it looks something like this. four guys walk into a bar and about half hour later the bar closes because they are already out of beer. as we leave, the bar spontaneously combusts and the naperville firefighter squad is called into action. now, because the naperville fire department did not take the advice of a warning e-mail sent to them by an anonymous author that fires would be popping up all over the city, they are not ready for the fire and bar number one burns to the ground. it doesn't stop there my friends.

multiple bars are visited and strange occurences start happening throughout the city. for the first time in the cities history, every bar is having karaoke all weekend. not only do they have karaoke but PBR and Natural Light are on sale for $1 everywhere you look. people see us as we walk into bars and cannot figure out why they know us. whispers of "they can't be the ghostbusters...they're missing the black guy" and "if they were going to rob the place they would all have black suits on" float through the air. at one time we wonder if we hear a conversation about a bearshark? as the girls walk by, they hesitate...wondering where they have smelt that combination of old spice and jaeger. it's mystifying and they can't help but stay and figure out what it is that is so desirable.

than we all wake up the next morning in a pile in the closet. there is a chick passed out in the tub and one naked on the bed wondering why she smells like old spice and jaeger only to later find a card in her purse. we all look at each other and laugh because that was only the first night and we have two left to go. with a war cry like BLAMMO! we enter the weekend hungover but ready to endure anything that comes our way. especially that chick who we thought was hot but then tossed her out of the room the next morning when we realized she looked liked something from Hellraiser.

Alright boys...let's get to it! BLAMMO!

I Love Rick Astley

http://youtube.com/watch?v=eBGIQ7ZuuiU

If you love Rick Astley you'll love this link!

Max's Ninjas

I saw this and thought of Max right away...how can you not?